Thursday, November 09, 2006

I am SUCH an IDIOT.

OK, do I feel stupid.

Perhaps even DUMBER than Kim Bauer felt when she realized that LA wasn't destroyed by a nuclear weapon.

No, scratch that. Definitely dumber.

Not only did I:

1. Lose my virginity
2. And my self respect
3. To my fath.......ick.
4. I also convinced my sister too. (fine, she was rather bitchy to me last week, so maybe she deserved it)

I think I'm going to be sick.

And all for what? To repopulate the planet and be some sort of modern Eve?

AHHHHHHHHH!

I'm going to be in therapy for years over this, I can see it now.

I'll tell you what. This won't be my last posting for a few reasons:

1. I keep getting fan-mail, so maybe I'll put up another post or two.
2. Stay tuned next week for a new biblical blog character. (suggestions and comments welcomed! Even Criticism)
3. Too much fun.
4. Thanks to DovBear for his link to my blog. Brought in over 400 hits! WooHoo! You hear me, DovBear is the coooolest! (Even if he thinks the Rashbam is reality, when it obviously isn't.)

PS: Don't forget to read the Parshas Shavua this week...

15 Comments:

Blogger Carmen O. said...

You can blog as Hagar. Or Eliezer. Or as Pichol, the general of Avimelech's army. That sounds like fun.

What about Bilhah and Zilpah? They seem to get short shrift all the time.

And if you get into the medrash on Esav's wives - woo hoo. Now you've got an incestuous party to rival the one you had last night.

Go forth and blogify.

8:16 AM  
Blogger Elie said...

For that matter, blogging as Rochel or Leah would be fascinating. Imagine being sisters and co-wives. There's surely a reason this was forbidden after mattan Torah.

How about blogging as Vashti? I'd love to hear her version of events.

All in all, this idea has lots of possibilities. A worthy successor to a classic by Mark Twain.

8:29 AM  
Blogger Elster said...

Ah, something different is always appreciated (and a little controversy never hurts either). I'd stay away from Rochel Leah (the whole who wats to burn in hell thing). Maybe eishes potifar and yoseph?

9:15 AM  
Blogger Elster said...

Does this mean you will be inventing a new blog for each character?

9:25 AM  
Blogger Steg (dos iz nit der ┼íteg) said...

you get NO SYMPATHY whatsoever. If you were your sister, maybe, but that crazy stuff in the mountains was YOUR idea!

12:25 PM  
Blogger Elie said...

I'd stay away from Rochel Leah (the whole who wats to burn in hell thing).

Are you suggesting that a little speculative (and obviously tongue in cheek) fiction on the imahos would be an unforgivable aveirah? I certainly hope God has a better sense of humor than that.

12:28 PM  
Blogger Elster said...

Elie - I'm really not so sure you are right about that. I'm not sure that G-d has a "sense of humor" at all.

I appreciate this blog on a purely fictional level. However, as I'm thinking about it, there are just some subjects where tongue in cheeck may noy be appropriate. The Holocaust and Hitler is one type of situation, perhaps the holy bible might be the other.

I'm not sure, just thinking my way through this....

12:32 PM  
Blogger Elie said...

I see your point of view, but this example wouldn't bother or offend me at all. Actually it would be a welcome countweight to the dittos my kids bring home from school, depicting the Avos wearing black hats.

But I'm sure we all have our sacred cows (so to speak).

12:36 PM  
Blogger Elster said...

So far, I agree that this blog is not "offensive" - at least not to me. I can see people being offended by it though. I'm just not sure if, even if nt offensive, it's a ppropriate.

Wait, are you telling me Avraham Aveinu didn't wear Borsalino???

1:41 PM  
Anonymous duh! said...

"I'm not sure that G-d has a "sense of humor" at all."

What!
G-d has a great sense of humor, I mean who do you think invented humor anyway?

You want proof, well think of kaporos or mitzva tance. In general I think whole human race is a big joke, just look at some of these comments.

10:51 AM  
Blogger Lot's Daughter said...

Elster: Yes - I'll be inventing a new blog weekly! :)

Elie; Oh yeah, G-d has a real funny sense of humor. Just go ask my mom. When our guests told us last week that Sodom was going to be destroyed, my mom whispered to me, "take everything they say with a grain of salt"

ba da bum.

5:05 PM  
Blogger Elster said...

Um, Duh? Those are not created by G-d, those are created by man.

7:12 PM  
Anonymous Azadi said...

Um, Duh? Those are not created by G-d, those are created by man.

But what about the platypus?

11:56 AM  
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